


Where In The World Are My Lucky Charms

by Wealthyolives



Category: Carmen Sandiego (Cartoon 2019)
Genre: Carmen Sandiego Chatfic, F/F, F/M, Give me more Carmen Sandiego content I don’t wanna write it, Graham deserves more love but I’m gonna make him suffer before we do that, I did not forget Player in the beginning no I did not, I wrote the first two at 2am I’m sorry, Jean Paul is a queen, Let Graham Say Puns, Longer chapters as I go on, M/M, Maelstrom doesn’t like Lucky Charms, Monopoly mispronunciations, Stop stealing Zack’s lucky charms, The relationships come in later but will be hinted at, Tigress and Graham low key bully each other, Vines are never dead, Why does everyone hate Tigress she’s a queen, Zack should really be dead with the way I hurt him, chatfic, how does one do tags, i have commitment issues I’m sorry, i have seen literally no Carmen Sandiego chatfics and this does not spark joy, i write chatfic’s cause grammar isn’t required, my wrist hurts from writing all this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-13 00:48:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29393616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wealthyolives/pseuds/Wealthyolives
Summary: I couldn’t find any Carmen Sandiego fics soooo take this piece of writing.Some quotes to peak interest,,Ivy: Tigress trying to kill my brother with a butter knife lives in my head rent freeJean Paul: Murder is a ConstructPlayer: A R S O NGraham: getting Mime Bomb to snipe them with an upgraded paintball gun
Relationships: Dash Haber/Zack, Gray | Crackle/Carmen Sandiego | Black Sheep, Julia "Jules" Argent/Ivy, Le Chèvre | Jean Paul/El Topo | Antonio, Mime Bomb/Neal the Eel (Carmen Sandiego), Paper Star/Tigress | Sheena
Comments: 30
Kudos: 83





	1. Zack almost dies lmao

**Author's Note:**

> Yay first fic on ao3 please for the love of god it’s acceptable

𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗲𝗱 𝗡𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝘀 

𝗧𝗶𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀: No, no I don’t think I will 

𝗧𝗶𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗹𝗲𝗳𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗴𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗽 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝘁

𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗲𝗱 𝗧𝗶𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀

𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻: you can never leave

𝗭𝗮𝗰𝗸: whoa hey now 

𝗣𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗲𝗿: is this a cult?

𝗣𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗲𝗿: cool

𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I don’t think I should be in any cults... 

𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻: You are all here

𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻: to s u f f e r

𝗝𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝗹: you don’t scare me 

𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻: does my blackmail on you scare you

𝗝𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝗹: fair enough just spare me and Antonio 

𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻: glad to see you agree

𝗜𝘃𝘆: spooky

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺: ^

𝗠𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝗕𝗼𝗺𝗯: ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ

𝗖𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 ‘𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺’

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺: ahh a play on words it’s beautiful

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: thank you thank you I try

𝗧𝗶𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀: 2/10 does not recommend

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: i won’t hesitate

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗧𝗶𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟭

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗝𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝗹’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗔𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗻𝗶𝗼’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯

𝗭𝗮𝗰𝗸: pFF

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: yOU SAID YOU’D SPARE US

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I spare no one.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺: ok ok but what about Furry-line

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺: like feline

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺: eh eh

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟭: please kill me I don’t want to live anymore

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: ^

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: n o

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: never mind life is a good thing

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: sEE YOU GET IT

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: no it’s just such a stupid name it equals an insult on its own

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: hey now

𝗣𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗲𝗿: you’re a rock star get your game on

𝗭𝗮𝗰𝗸: gO PLAYYYY

𝗜𝘃𝘆: no I’m stopping this now

𝗭𝗮𝗰𝗸: but

𝗜𝘃𝘆: I will tie a knot with your vocal cards I am not doing this again

𝗣𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗲𝗿: alright fair enough I like my vocal cords

𝗭𝗮𝗰𝗸: agreed

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗣𝗹𝗮𝘆𝗲𝗿’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝘏𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘳 𝘷𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝗜’𝗺 𝗶𝗻

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗶𝗻: I can live with this

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗭𝗮𝗰𝗸’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: goddamnit

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: ?

𝗜𝘃𝘆: For the love of god just leave it

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗜𝘃𝘆’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗶𝗻: as you should ✨💅🏽

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Hell yea 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: you deserve it

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: sHe DeSeRvEs A nIcE nAmE bUt I dOnT??

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: no

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗶𝗻: She’s still mad about you stealing her croutons 

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: i sAID I WAS SORRY AND ITS NOT LIKE SHADOWSAN COULDNT HAVE STOPPED ME

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: yes but he took me shopping so he’s fine

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I hate Capitalism

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ya know what she’s the only one that deserves a good name it’s fine

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: iS THAT A PUN

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: why do we encourage him again

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: cause pretty much everyone here thinks he’s cute

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟭: e w

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: Tigress used E w it’s really never effective why does she use it

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟭: fuck you Freckles

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: is that even a insult

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: *an

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟭: I will rip them off your face try me

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: no I don’t think I will

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆 #𝟭’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: just fucking end me

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: anytime anywhere Kit Kat 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗠𝗶𝗺𝗲 𝗕𝗼𝗺𝗯’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ︻デ═一

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Jesus I forgot you were here

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ^

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: ^

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: ^

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: Tigress stop cackling it’s concerning

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: nah

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I have been traumatized

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I can’t believe you gagged at caviar in front of Cleo

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: lmao mood

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗶𝗻: why are you with Cleo??

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: she invites me and the other one to dinner parties

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: wowowo I feel insulted

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: Fish is absolutely ✨discostang✨ And I stand by that

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I hear the boss music playing

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: F

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: ??

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: yOU FUCKING WHA

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: yOU GOT THE GOOD KUSH AND YOU SAID NAH?

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: @Pop Off Queen whERE YOU HOES LIVE CAUSE IM ABOUT TO RIP THIS LEPRECHAUN A NEW FACE HOLE

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: professionally I can’t help you cause I care for my brother’s safety

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: unprofessionally we live in the dorms, the ones closest to the parking lot, the door is open and has a dorky af movie poster can’t miss it.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: thank you my new favorite ❤️💎

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻:🎷🐛

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: 𝗜 𝗮𝗺 𝘂𝗻𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗳𝗼𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗿𝗴𝘆 𝘄𝗲’𝘃𝗲 𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗱𝗶𝗼 𝘁𝗼𝗱𝗮𝘆

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: i don’t know what that means but I think I second that

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: wait wait forget about Zack dying we need to teach Jules vines/memes

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: Vines are deader than Graham’s old goldfish

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: i diD NOT MEAN TO ELECTROCUTE THE WATER ISTFG MATE

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: hOLY SHIT HOWD YOU GET HERE SO FAST

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: doNT BE A MURDERER

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I’m whatever Gotham need me to be

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: did you just quote Batman

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: lmao nerd

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: shut the fuck up you burnt toast lookalike before I didgeridoo you to Saturn

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: 𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝗜 𝘁𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: gAYS PLEASKWNSJEJI

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: I wonder if that was intentional

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: probably

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: F

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: no we do not F for commoners Antonio

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: dude I literally just saw you eating ramen sitting on your counter

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: seems pretty commoner

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: No it’s to assert dominance on weak minded ones like you

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: and you have to say that you’re fine

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: when you’re really not fine

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: but you can’t really get into it cause they could never understand

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I will do a sharknado marathon with you if you just put down the vines

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I put down the vines but what do I do with these plastic explosives

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: pLEASE TELL ME YOU’RE JOKING! THAT’S ILLEGAL!

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Lmao yea I was kidding totally don’t need a new home for these explosives

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: please

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Also what’s a vine? I have a feeling you don’t mean the plant.

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: yOOOOO

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: yOOOOO

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: yo?

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: time for a time montage where we shall give Jules the knowledge of all memes and vines

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: disappointed but not surprised

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: i aLMOST FUCKING D I E D

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: and you would have if I had not chipped a nail

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Tigress trying to kill my brother with a butter knife lives in my head rent free

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: yooo that’s the tea sister

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: tf

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆:

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻:

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: wHAT DID YOU GUYS DO TO MY POOR SWEET INNOCENT JULE BEAN

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Wig?Snatched. Hotel?Trivago.

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: @𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮 Remember that time you threatened to shove shards of porcelain broken from the dirtiest toilets down my throat?

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: yuh I dare you to make me drop my croissant again

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: please do it now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- Tigress seems the type to not like fish but like caviar cause she’s weird like that
> 
> -Let Jules Vine
> 
> -Graham is my favorite I swear but seeing him get roasted also sparks joy.
> 
> -R.I.P Graham’s Goldfish “Bubbles” 2020-2020
> 
> -Yes tigress is a dork and she likes Batman.
> 
> -Don’t worry Cleo took the explosives
> 
> -Stop you coulda made me drop my croissant
> 
> -I asked my editor “name an insult for Zack”
> 
> -And she came up with freckles
> 
> -I am ashamed and proud


	2. Is it ok to murder for Lucky Charms?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m actually ecstatic people read this. That’s all. Oh and thanks to my editor helping decipher my typos and helping me edit at Midnight cause we both have no self preservation.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: What’s crackle lackin

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: someone stole my motherfuckling lucky chARMS

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: motherfuckling

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: motherfuckling

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: shut that’s not important right now. I’m so disappointed in all of you I don’t care who it was I’m disappointed.

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗪𝗵𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗹𝗲 𝗺𝘆 𝗹𝘂𝗰𝗸𝘆 𝗰

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ugh god Chat Box Limit 

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: “who the fuck stole my lucky cock rings.”

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: lmao cock rings

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Seems Legit

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I come back from committing minor felonies to this 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: ah I see

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: since I let Tigress murder you last time I guess I’ll help you this time

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: wh

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: Caremn

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: Caremn

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: Carmen please tell me your not stealing back cock rings

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: You’re*

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: so Jean Paul didn’t steal these t h I n g s from you

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: nO?? THATS NOT HOW IT WORKS?? ARE YOU IN MY FUCKING HOUSE??

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: well not anymore

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: hon,, I’m gonna fucking shank you and your “Rudolph the Red Clothed degenerate,” ass

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: u can try

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: but for future reference

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: hOW DO YOU GAYS/GRAYS ACTUALLY FEEL ABOUT MURDER??

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: Murder is a construct

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: No, no it’s really not.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Please don’t murder.

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: don’t murder children! Adults are ok ig

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: eh seems reasonable

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: does it? Does it really?

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: unless the children are dicks ig that’s understandable

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻:

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆:

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: still seems kinda reasonable

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: they should be thankful it’s me taking their life and not someone with no fashion sense like Fedora the Explora

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: ok one fuck you 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: two you wish you had my fashion sense you useless lesbian

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: aight bet square up

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: bet Kit Kat, behind Denny’s 3am

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ew Denny’s

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ?have you no taste?

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: better than someone who doesn’t like motherfucking caviar

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: no no she’s got a point

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: soooo you’re not gonna do it?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I see I see sooo

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: if you make one joke about me going to the cutter istfg

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: was that a warrior cats reference

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: lmao nerd

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: here’s something your tiny brain can understand

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I’m going to pull a Steve Erwin death on you but with a giant fucking spear instead

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: https://youtu.be/2zgcFFvEA9g

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Look what you did.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Look it’s got depression.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: my mood just went from piss poor to wow thank you Jules you just made my day

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: the second mood is a mood I feel a lot

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: ^

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ^

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: ^

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: anyways back to the question at hand

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: who ate my lucky charms

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: n o

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: how do the degenerates feel about murder

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: watching or committing

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: There are different feelings?

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: excuse e moi ofc they are different

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: be nice ^ but yea they are different

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ew god n I c e

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: but y uh they different

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Well sorry I just thought that both reactions should be “oh hey that’s awful.”

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: but go off I guess.

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: imagine being like “oh hey that’s awful,” while you stab someone in the gut repeatedly

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Player.

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: I feel fear

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: what’s your different opinions then

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: well watching murder is like

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: uh hey you probably shouldn’t do that but I’m not not gonna stop you so you do you ig

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: murdering people is like

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: oh no have mercy

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: pity for I have no fucks to give

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: and then you 360 no scope them

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿'̿'\̵͇̿̿\з= ( ▀ ͜͞ʖ▀) =ε/̵͇̿̿/’̿’̿ ̿ ̿̿ ̿̿ ̿̿

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: have you been lurking this whole time?

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: aight fair enough

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: no none of those answers are- no

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I agree murder is bad.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Unless it’s Bellum, she can perish.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: yo

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I get that she can be a date

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: but she and Cleo low key adopted me and shit so explain

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: She took board walk.

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: and Maelstrom keeps shitting on real estate

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: wh

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: yALL PLAYING MONOPONO WITHOUT ME

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: mOnOpOnO

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: yea that’s Graham’s fault as most things are

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: oi 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: spill the fucking tea you French twink

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: Carmen didn’t know what monopoly was and Graham pronounces it Monopono like a crack whore

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: it’s a habit now

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: anyways

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: tHE FUCK???

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: yea we’ve been playing for hours

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I’m losing my sanity.

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: just you two cause honestly that’d just be wholesome monopono

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: “not to be an asshole but can I have board walk”

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: “yea sure no problemo🤗”

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: it makes me gag

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Lol no we’re playing with the grown up chat.

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: grown up chat??

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: uh yea Nani the fuck

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: are you not a grown up??

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: not what I’m pressed about but appreciating Jules is wholesome enough to say grown up like a ten year old

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: yea the grown ups have a chat they gossip on

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: They let me and Antonio play games with them.

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗜 𝘁𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: ^

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Oh and btw Maelstrom is the one who took your lucky charms Zack.

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: TF

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: PASTY AND ME ABOUT TO COME TO BLOWS

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: he didn’t even eat them though,, he drilled holes in the charms and made a necklace for the winner of monopoly

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: what the fuck even

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Also I got baby pictures of Carmen from Shadowsan.

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: fear intensifieS

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: yo Jules link me the good shit

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Alright.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: omfg the baby rOLLS

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: gRAHAM

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I’m posting these they need to be shared to the world

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: g r a y

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: 𝗜 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗯 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗮 𝗿𝘂𝘀𝘁𝘆 𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗿𝗸

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: no you won’t I’m your favorite

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: EIDJJWKW

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: lmAO NOTHING LIKE WATCHING FEDORA THE EXPLORA BREAKING IN AND DRAGGING AWAY A SCREAMING AUSSIE

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: if he dies I claim his video games

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: why are you at Graham’s house??

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: well he was doing my nails but uh fuck that ig one hand manicure all the way

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: baby no we are doing a proper spa day come over now

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: aight sweet

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Is no one worried for Graham’s safety???

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: had it coming 

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ^

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ^

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: ^

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: ^

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Date = Asshole
> 
> -Steve Erwin, was a famous Australian, famous for getting up close and personal to dangerous animals. Anyways he got shanked in the heart by a stingray. F.
> 
> -Warrior Cats was my shit in 4th grade ofc I’m gonna mention it
> 
> -Are all your friends annoying and clingy? You just can’t get rid of them? Play monopoly! Ruins friendships for free!
> 
> -I’ll probably do a thing with the grown up chat + other VILE operatives that aren’t main but have a place in my heart
> 
> -Ships are coming I swear.
> 
> -Me: maybe Carmen uses periods
> 
> -Me: nah she’s a degenerate 
> 
> -so close to making an AOT reference
> 
> -Typing out Carman and Graham’s names physically hurt me


	3. Zack Almost Dies Lmao pt.2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I can get a Graham profile on Netflix and the joy I feel is astronomical. 
> 
> Also JeanTonio/Red Crackle stans this chapter was for you

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: who did it

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: honestly we leave you guys alone for 5 minutes

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: It was Graham’s fault

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I suddenly have ✨memory loss✨

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: of course. Everything is Graham’s fault

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:yea well you look like you’ve never been in a laundromat

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: is that an insult??

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: it says something about your character

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: I’m confused what happened?

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Zack fell from a very tall height and we’re pretty sure he has a concussion

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: iN MY DEFENSE IT’S MOSTLY JEAN PAUL’S FAULT

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: wOW I CANT BELIEVE YOU ARE BLAMING ME

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Please explain.

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: Zack for some godforsaken reason decided to challenge Jean Paul to a climbing contest

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I want to defend my brother I do

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: but he’s such a dumbass

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: keep going I need the deets

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: god you are such a dork “deets”

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: at least dorks are cute unlike you Kit Kat

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: ^ and so we went to the rock climbing wall at the park right

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Antonio and me decided to place bets

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Of course you did.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I put 20$ on Jean Paul cause I’m not dumb

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: iM NOT DUMB I JUST FELT BAD

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: and Antonio put 2$ on Zack

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: anyways Jean Paul got so fucKING JE-RDUBKNRDH

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: s I l e n c e h e a t h e n

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: ?

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: ?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: ?

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ?

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: since me and graham share a braincell he was about to say Jea- s9akodekmd

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: I said s I l e n c e

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: moving on from Carmen and Graham getting kidnapped by an angry French man

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Vive La France

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: Jean Paul baited Zack into not wearing safety gear

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Oh god why???

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: none of your business four eyes

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: oi be nice to Jules

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: no

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: be nice

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: ok

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: Hey that’s gay

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ¬‿¬

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: shhhhut the fuck up

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: anYWAYS HOW DID MY BROTHER GET BRAIN DAMAGE

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: he’s never gonna pass school at this point

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I don’t need a degree to be a clothes hanger

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Is he ok-?

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: no I’m calling Shadowsan to knock him out

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: Breaking News: Sick af ninja dad coming to rescue dumb dumb son

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: Breaking News: never mind he just knocked him out

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: Breaking News: he does what we’re all thinking

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: anyways yea Zack and Jean Paul started the contest but Zack couldn’t find anymore grips and he didn’t have any safety gear

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: So he fell?

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: uh sort of

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: I told Graham to film the contest and so when Zack said “can anyone catch me”

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: Graham said “got u” but he was replying to me about filming but Zack thought Graham was talking to him so he just sort of

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: l e t g o

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: sO WHAT DID GRAHAM DO??

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: “oh damn you wanted me to catch you? I suppose you could say you’ve fallen for me.”

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: yea lmao Zack twitched a bit when he said that

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: a valiant effort to cringe or laugh ig

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: kill me with extreme force

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I’ll do it then stab myself

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Speaking of Graham what happened to him and Carmen?

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: oh lmao Jean Paul locked us in a closet so we picked the lock and went out for ice cream

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: it was an ice escape from reality

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: s t o p

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: jeez don’t be so vanilla

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: This is Carmen I took Graham’s phone away

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: a god amongst humans

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: we’re just gonna finish our ice cream and then head back

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: CARMEN SANDIEGO WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THIS MESS IN THE KITCHEN?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: oh no his battery is dying

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: C A R M E N!

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Alexa Play Despacito

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: dONT YOU DARE LEAVE US FEDORA THE EXPLORA

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: FUCK TAKE ME WITH YOU JULES FOUND ME AND TIGRESS

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: EXPLAIN N O W

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: lmao degenerates

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: shut the fuck up you burnt chicken nugget go jump off a bridge like Javert

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: was that a Les Miserables reference

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: lmao nerd

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: diD YOU COME BACK JUST FOR THAT YA PRICK

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: oH YOU GUYS CAN GET MAD AT US FOR ALMOST KILLING ZACK BUT I CANT MAKE FUN OF YOU FOR BEING DEGENERATES

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: you have disappointed

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: all three of us

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: YEA YOU H Y P O C R I T E S 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: yEA BUT AT LEAST OUR’S WASNT CAUSED BY YOU BEING A GAY DISASTER

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: ?

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮: be S I L E N T

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: Is this about the sexual tension between Antonio and Jean Paul

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟮 𝗹𝗲𝗳𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝘁

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯:

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: uh I’m gonna go talk to him

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: FUCKING SUPERB YOU FUNKY LITTLE GAY

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: GO GET YO MANS

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: THE K I T CH E N

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: ItWasTigress

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ItWasIvy

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀:

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: fine fine I’ll tell you just please don’t glare at meeeee

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀:

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: so uh we wanted to see what would happen if we blew up a pressurized can of shaving cream

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Why? Why are we here? To suffer?

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I’mSorry

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I’m not and I’d do it again

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: wait so what happened

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: I need to know for s c I e n c e

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Please don’t bomb someone/something with shaving cream.

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: darn

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: an appropriate theme song for the kitchen is “White Christmas”

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: an appropriate meme is “We’ve won but at what cost”

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: an appropriate vine is “There is white shit everywhere.”

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: oH YOU COME BACK FOR THAT BUT YOU CANT TAKE RESPONSIBILITY

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: BOTH OF YOU

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺:

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: oh no you’re fading out

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: THATS NOT HOW THIS WORKS

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯 𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗲𝗱 𝗝𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝗹

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: ayy is it good

𝗝𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝗹: no fuck off

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯: He’s lying it’s very good

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: mhm v e e e e r y gud

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: I mean your names are meant to mean Top and Bottom we all saw that coming

𝗝𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝗹:

𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯:

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: fUCKING FINALLY BEING THE FIFTH WHEEL HURTED

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Fifth-?

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: oh so we’re just acting like two people here aren’t on a date right now

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: fair enough

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I came here to change our happy couple’s names not get exposed

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: go back to your cave Kit Kat

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: back, back I say

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗝𝗲𝗮𝗻 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝗹’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗙𝘂𝗿𝗿𝘆#𝟯’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): (◕‿◕)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -I am a theatre nerd yes
> 
> -Where in the world is my editor?
> 
> -They’ve left me and I am suffering
> 
> -The irony of memory loss
> 
> -if it wasn’t clear the three people Antonio refers to is him, Jean Paul, and Graham
> 
> -from uh research I know what happens when you blow up shaving cream cans
> 
> -the thing player wanted to bomb was that one anti-technology teacher but non lethally
> 
> -I’m thinking of doing a chapter with just the grown up chat or dedicate a whole chapter to ship and regular head canon’s
> 
> -the first chapter not edited at 2am 
> 
> -I am l I v I n g for it


	4. They’re Thieves Your Honor What Did You Expect?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just me watching Season 4 while writing this and having mixed emotions
> 
> Also would anyone else kill to see an AU where Graham and Jules are partners in A.C.M.E.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: what’s crackle lackin

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: oh wait it’s not my cRACKLE ROD

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: 𝗪𝗛𝗢 𝗦𝗧𝗢𝗟𝗘 𝗜𝗧

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: HAHA ITS NOT FUNNY WHEN SOMEONE STEALS SOMETHING FROM YOU IS IT?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: SHUT IT YOU ABSOLUTE BABOON AND IF YOU STOLE IT I WILL REARRANGE YOUR FACE

———————— 𝗗𝗠𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗞𝗶𝗻𝗴 

𝗞𝗶𝗻𝗴: this was a mistake

𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: a mistake we will laugh about

𝗞𝗶𝗻𝗴: no no he really w I l l kill us

𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: but we needed it for important science reasons

𝗞𝗶𝗻𝗴: I suppose when we die we will go to the grave knowing that the crackle rod can indeed make pop corn

𝗞𝗶𝗻𝗴: it wasn’t worth it but ya know 

𝗞𝗶𝗻𝗴: w h a t e v e r

𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: ya think he’ll be more mad that there is now butter all over it?

𝗞𝗶𝗻𝗴: let’s just make sure he doesn’t find out

𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I am going to go hide under my bed

———————

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: someone is going to die 

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Of fun.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: no Jules by death

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I thought that was clear

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: how about mild decapitation instead

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: fine

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : how do you mildly decapitate someone?

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : “we’re gonna cut your head off”

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : “but only a little”

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: yea I bet it’d be a pain in the neck

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I’m going back to bed

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: nO YOU ARENT PUSSY CAT NOT UNTIL I FOUND OUT WHO STOLE MY CRACKLE ROD

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: GIVE ME YOUR BLOODY EXCUSES YOU DAMN BOGANS

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: i aM nOt A bOgAn

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: ya know what

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I’ll take it you’re off the suspect list

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: wh

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: WHY’D YOU LET HIM OFF SO EASILY

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: HE’S EASILY THE MOST SUSPICIOUS OUT OF ALL OF US

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: AND WE ARE WANTED CRIMINALS

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: cause mate

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I like koalas

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: and he was with me when my crackle rod got stolen so he’s good

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : What were you two even doing together?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: 

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: no comment

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: that makes me wanna know even more

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: suspicious noises 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: so you think that sounds “Fishy” Zack?

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I will disown you

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: They were watching Frozen 2 while eating Zack’s lucky charms

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I can’t believe you’ve done this Antonio

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: yea flip that table!

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : aNaRcHy

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: How about we don’t do that.

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: god I just want to eat my lucky charms in P E A C E

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: if you stole my crackle rod you will eat them in p I e c e s

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: wh

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: Mom come pick me up I’m scared

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: there is no peace here

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Only war.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: and pain

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : and the salty tears of regret

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: are you guys ok???

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: they are playing Mario Kart

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘧𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘩 𝘧𝘳𝘺 

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I can hear Tigress’s rage screams, Carmen and Player crying in regret and Jules obliterating them

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: No mercy.

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: hot

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: 🥰

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: well that was weirdly wholesome/terrifying 

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: so one down seven to go

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: just so you know

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I will hunt down whoever did this

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: and rip them to tiny particles

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: jESUS CHILL WHY DOES IT MATTER SO MUCH

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: IT IS *MY* SPARKY STICK

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: And Carmen stole it for me and said if I ever lost it she’d punch me in the gut

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: ooooooohhhh yeaaaa I did say that 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: Power to ya then I’m planning on running Tigress of rainbow road

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: bITCH STOP

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Gimme your alibi’s heathens

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I was still knocked out after falling and hitting my heAd, Ivy and ShadowSan can vouch for me

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: oh yea kinda forgot about that

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I will never do trust falls with you

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: e v e r

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: that’s fair

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: maybe you’ll wear safety gear next time

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: safety gear is for the weak

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: aight JP see how that works out for ya

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I plan on it

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: also call me JP again and I will hurt you

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: you literally can’t touch this but go for it

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: also Graaaaaaaayyyy gray gRay

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: yes yes

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: me and Jules are good we were at ACME’s annual dinner party

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: their what now

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: aND I WASNT INVITED??

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: First, you get dinner parties with Cleo all the time step off sister

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: Secondly, I have witnesses and more proof I couldn’t have stolen it

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: man once you said “me and Jules” I was sold

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Jules can’t lie, even if her life depended on it

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Hey.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: yea it wasn’t me either, I don’t like you or your crackle rod enough to even go near them

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: accepted you may pass

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: wHY WOULD YOU JUST ACCEPT THAT?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: oh I know for a fact Pussy Cat won’t touch my crackle rod

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: ??

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: d o n t

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: when we were training using the crackle rods, Tigress tasered herself so bad that she refuses to touch any crackle rods 

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ‘Twas nearly a flesh wound

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: was that a Holy Grail reference?

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: lmao nerd

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: MY CRACKLE ROD HAS ALREADY BEEN STOLEN

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: DONT TAKE MY LINES TOO

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: ITS ALL I HAVE LEFT OK

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: yea not even dignity sticks around with this guy

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: he is the definition of “I am totally going to do this cool thing and then fails horribly.”

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: research ‘Failure’ in the dictionary and the definition will just be Graham’s face

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Guys be nice.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: honestly it’s fine

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: cause when I find out who stole my crackle rod

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I will release the agony of a thousand lost souls on to them

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: gonna be honest here

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I didn’t do it

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: e x p l a I n

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I was dying my hair again

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Me and Carmen helped him bring the stuff to his room and we’re there for a little, while he set up; So he’s telling the truth.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: fair enough

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Player

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Ivy

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Jean Paul

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: you better have damn good excuses

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : while your crackle rod is sick af I was on a marathon

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: what kind of marathon?

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : Twilight Movies + Pokémon Games

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: holy hell

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : I like cackling at sparkly vampires while bringing another Lillipup to my army

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ooo who’s in your team

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : uh Lillipup, Snivy, One Purrloin named after Tigress and some others I don’t really care about but are cool

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: you are my new favorite

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: cool cool. Can I call you Stripey?

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: no

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : welp I tried

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: so Ivy and Jean Paul have gone pretty quiet

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I v y

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: J e a n P a u l

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I have no idea what you’re talking about

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: iT WAS ALL JEAN PAUL I WAS FORCED

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻 LOOK KOALA’S 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: P l e a s e D o n t K I l l M e

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: WHY DID A CHAIR JUST GET THROWN THROUGH MY WINDOW

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Explain or p e r I s h

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: wE WANTED TO SEE IF WE COULD MAKE POP CORN WITH THE CRACKLE ROD

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: you WHAT

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: hol up

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: did it work?

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: surprisingly well yea

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I am going to give you guys a 5 second head start

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Why is Jean Paul climbing on top of the school building?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Why is Ivy running across the campus?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Guys come on I left for 5 minutes.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: WHY IS THERE BUTTER ALL OVER THIS

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: alright I didn’t want to do this but time for Plan B

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: you wanted to use Plan B all along didn’t you

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Yea lil bit

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Plan B?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Getting Mime Bomb to snipe them with an upgraded Paintball Gun

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : So I was watching on the school security system and

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: whY ARE YOU ON THE SCHOOL SECURITY SYSTEM?

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : unimportant Zacky my boy

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I am literally older than you

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : what’s with you and saying unimportant things

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : anyways Mime Bomb just took down Jean Paul

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : he’s just lying down by the dorms covered in hot pink paint if you wanna get him Antonio

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: Gracias Jugador 

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : 👉👉

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 :

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : Remind me to never get on Mime Bomb’s bad side

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: lmao y

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : he just nico nico’d Ivy’s kneecaps and is shooting her while she’s on the ground

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: as he should

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ( ´-ω･)︻┻┳══━一

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> \- We all know Ivy and Jean Paul are the respective King and Queen’s of the chat
> 
> -Bogan means Unsuccessful person I believe
> 
> -Correct me if I’m wrong
> 
> -Typing out names still physically and spiritually hurts me
> 
> -This chapter got deleted a quarter through I am sad
> 
> -lots of Player since I kinda forgot him in my first draft
> 
> -Gracias Jugador = Thank You Player


	5. This chapter is sponsored by me seeing a kitten at a soccer field

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes yes I give you the grown up chat,,
> 
> Have a little guide to the names
> 
> Chief- Please End My Suffering
> 
> Coach Brunt - Mama Bear
> 
> Maelstrom - That one phantom in an opera
> 
> Cleo - Whomst
> 
> Bellum - Nyah
> 
> Chase - I think I saw a lA FEMME ROUGE 
> 
> Shadowsan - Dadowsan 
> 
> Roundabout - Oh how the turntables 
> 
> Some of these names are sentences I’m going to cry
> 
> Why do I do this

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Which one of you just robbed the shoe store?

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮 : What’s a shoe store?

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: I choose to remain silent till my getaway driver gets here.

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: reject shoes become Monke

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: fOR THE LOVE OF

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: I SAID LETS GO ROB A FEW DOORS

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: WHY DID YOU ROB THE GODDAMN SHOE STORE

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Personally I thought you said “Let’s go rob a shoe store.”

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Not my fault you can’t pronounce.

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: shut it twig

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: why would I even want to rob a shoe store??

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: Why would you want to rob doors??

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: BECAUSE DO YOU NOT SEE THE GAPS WHERE THE DOORS USED TO BE

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: oh yea what happened there

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: The runts broke them down

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: ?they did? How?

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮 : More accurately they burnt them down with a flamethrower.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Who gave them a flamethrower?

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: I just wanna talk.

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Now Shadowsan. 

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Go easy on Saira.

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: Eh? First name basis?

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Bellum.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: You better have good locks on your doors.

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: AT LEAST I WASNT THE ONE WHO GAVE THEM TRANQUILIZER GUNS

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: YOU SAID YOU WOULDNT TELL

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: I mean what who would ever do that

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴:

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: hehe my bad

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Explain.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Both of you.

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: They mentioned ghost hunting

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: what better to do with ghosts then a flamethrower

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: hAVE YOU NOT WATCHED GHOST BUSTERS

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: OBVIOUSLY YOU NEED A VACUUM

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮 : I can hear Shadowsan, Chief and Countess Cleo all collectively sighing in disappointment.

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: So you gave them flamethrowers..

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: And they burnt a door down.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Several doors.

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: at least they didn’t rob a shoe store

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Please that store was a sham anyways.

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮 : Those shoes would have broken anyone’s ankles.

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮 : The audacity of those cretinous shoe makers.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: So I just found out that..

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: One of the ‘Runts’ got knocked out by Calloway and Jean Paul clocking them in the face.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Cause they thought that they were a ghost.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: If it was Carmen I’ll slit their throats.

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: if it was Julia I will run me and my car into them

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: touch my sparky child and I will jump you

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Touch the gay French man and I will shove these cruddy heels through your eyes.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: No it’s-.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Homicide isn’t-.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: I am this done🤌🏾.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: It was the mime one that they punched.

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: Well ok that’s fair.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Shouldn’t you be worried none the less??

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: nah not really

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: @I think I saw a lA FEMME ROUGE now explain why you gave them tranquilizer guns.

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: Well I didn’t mean to

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: I said “I bet you can’t steal anything from me”

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: anyways I’m still missing my car, badge, tranquilizer gun and furniture

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: They are thieves what did you honestly expect.

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: IM NOT SURE JUST NOT THAT

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: I am surrounded by idiots.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: How did they steal your furniture?

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: I assume it was when I was in the kitchen having my weekly visit with Julia

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: They took it all while you were still in the house?? 

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: yea I’m kinda surprised

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: I can never get the couch through the door frame

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: so props to them

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻:

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: I’m going to stab him.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: For the betterment of humanity.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Please don’t, watching him run into glass doors is the only thing that makes me happy these days.

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: damn that’s depressing

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: do ya need a hug

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: No offense but I’d rather shoot myself with a sawed off shot gun then have one of your murder hugs.

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: well I wasn’t going to

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: but it can be arranged

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: kinky

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: also I was looking at the schedule and why is ‘KAROKE NIGHT’ on here

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: Ahh yes.

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: ah fuck no

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: Can’t you get in the spirit of things.

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: Killjoy.

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: after the Halloween, Christmas and New Years incidents?

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: no

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: What were those incidents?

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Do you remember the school next over getting blown up with glitter bombs and C4?

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴:

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: That was New Years.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: And that was tame.

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: and we’re still banned from every amusement park

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: They called us ‘terrorists’ a ‘disgrace to society’ I honestly think it was being creative. Society’s standards can’t appreciate true beauty.

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: can I borrow Chase for a second

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Sure.

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: thanks

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: ?

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: ?

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: I want to tie him to a rocket and see what happens

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: that went from 1 to 100

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: No it’s always been 100.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: A l w a y s.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: You can never escape it.

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: @Please End My Suffering you’re as equally overworked and tired as him can you make him idk s t o p

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Be silent replacement.

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: please don’t tie me to a rocket I just got my suit fixed

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: who wants to bet on how high he flies

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: He won’t make it 10 feet.

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Why?

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Because aPPARENTLY CRASHING THINGS OF VALUE IS HIS ONLY SKILL!

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: I SAID I WAS SORRY

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: YOUR LAST CAR WAS STOLEN BY THE ‘RUNTS’ AHD THE ONE BEFORE THAT GOT SAWED IN H A L F!

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: RAILROADS ARE INCONVENIENTLY PLACED

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: I have a question about legal matters

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: That ass isn’t legal.

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: thank you I was born with it

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: wHO THE HELL SHOWED MAELSTROM PICK UP LINES

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: HE CAN BE SMOOTH AF!

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: ITS FUCKING CREEPY STOP

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: moving on

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: is it legal

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Whatever you’re about to say isn’t legal.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Don’t

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: No keep going I’m invested.

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: is it legal to steal every cat in a cat cafe

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: cause one of the runts said they could rob more cats than me so I took them all

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: YOU ALREADY ROBBED THE CAFE?

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀:

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: noooooo-?

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: Where are the cats now?

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: definitely not in the first floor art room

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: I am not heading there right now.

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: I also do not have alcohol in here

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: alright I’m sold

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Why?

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Why?

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Devineaux I better not see you heading towards the art room.

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: then you most definitely do not

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: D e v I n e a u x.

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: but cats

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: CATS

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Look what you did.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴:DID YOU JUST JUMP OUT THE WINDOW OF THE THIRD STORY? 

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: WITH A JETPACK?

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: TO SEE CATS?

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Disappointed but not surprised.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: So that’s three of you that have done something illegal today.

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: Bellum just jumped on three students to get to the art room.

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: C A T S

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: I’m gonna show her the movie ‘Cats’

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Do not.

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: I will harvest your insides.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: So 4 doing illegal things.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: It’s at least better than Saturday.

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: YOU SAID AND I QUOTE

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: WE SHOULD GET SNACKS FOR MONOPOLY NIGHT

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: I DID NOT MEAN ROB THE NEAREST STORE!

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: WELL THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE SPECIFIED THAT

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: personally I think Maelstrom lighting a fire station on fire and laughing about irony after Shadowsan put him in mortgage was more impressive

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: I can’t believe Julia said heck

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: she’s been ruined

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: but wasn’t El Topo throwing Bellum off a roof more impressive

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: I dreamed to fly and i flew

𝗧𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗣𝗵𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗜𝗻 𝗔𝗻 𝗢𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗮: Until you hit Roundabout’s kiddie pool on the way down.

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: I feel like I’m gonna regret asking.. 

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: But why do you have a kiddie pool?

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: it is for the dogs

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: How many of those dogs are stolen?

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: what’s 3-1 again?

𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗘𝗻𝗱 𝗠𝘆 𝗦𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: Oh thank god I was expecting-

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: cause put that to the exponent of 5

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: GOOD LORD

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: cats are better

𝗡𝘆𝗮𝗵: but Cleo is slightly better than cats

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: Oh uh well you’re just below crowns.

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: that’s

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: She doesn’t know how to show affection give her a second.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Roundabout is actually kinda fun to write 
> 
> -Lowkey Bellum/Cleo Roundabout/Maelstrom 
> 
> -Next chapter is either gonna be a really long one with the og cast showing what the grown ups were gossiping about or it’s Gonna be more grown ups or even maybe the other operatives
> 
> -Idk I’m indecisive
> 
> -God gave me many skills
> 
> -Decision making got fucking obliterated though 
> 
> -I am not a clever woman
> 
> -Coach Brunt and Tigress are the respective 5th wheels and I felt that
> 
> -I’ll explain the grown ups names in another episode
> 
> -Sobbing in Graham’s last name is Calloway and I love him so fucking much
> 
> -Ugh I hate writers block
> 
> -I’ll try and make the next chapter longer and better than whatever this one was


	6. Part 1 of we are going to do this thing that we are going to regret but let’s do it anyways

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Paper Star comes in ✨✨ don’t know if she stays but she’s fun to write
> 
> Part 2 is a work in progress so keep an eye out for the update lovelies
> 
> Its gonna have some juicy quotes

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Please to everything holy tell me none of you are going to do something dumb about the rumor going around.

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Oho rumor? 

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: Rumor you say? 

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: you mean the one about the old school 

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: That the staff blew up and swore us to secrecy 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: If it’s the rumor about how They say glitter still lines the halls

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: everyone knows that rumor 

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻 : no Jules means the new one about the ghost haunting the old school next over 

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:Does it take sacrifices?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Cause I volunteer Ivy and Jean Paul 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: WE SAID WE WERE SORRY 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: AND WE SAID SORRY AFTER YOU COVERED US IN HOT PINK PAINT 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I LOOKED LIKE A DANGANRONPA CRIME SCENE 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: MY FRECKLES ARE PINK NOW 

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: lmao pop off queen

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I am driven by pure spite and pettiness don’t test me 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: it’s true I stole one of his coffee cakes and he didn’t forgive me for 3 months

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: no I’m still salty

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Oh thank goodness you guys aren’t planning to do anything detrimental about the ghost rumor.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: oh really?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Don’t.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: really really?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Please.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: Would be a shame if someone ruined that

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Tigress.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: LMAO WHO WANTS TO GO GHOST HUNTING

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: Honestly hell yea

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: ^

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: how about I don’t

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: he won’t do it cause he’s chicken

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I AM NOT CHICKEN

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: glad to have you along comrade

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: dammit

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I’ll go if Jean Paul is

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: gags at the happy relationship

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: I’ve always wanted to reenact Poltergeist 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I’ll go and drag Zack along

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: DONT DRAG ME

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I DONT WANT THIS LIFE

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Are you all serious.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Try and save them from getting hurt but noooooo.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I don’t even see why I try.

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: We aren’t idiots Jules. We won’t go ghost hunting t o n I g h t.

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: WE RIDE AT DAWN BITCHES

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: SOME OF YOU MAY DIE

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: BUT IF ANY OF YOU DO

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I HOPE ITS IVY AND JEAN PAUL

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I really hate you

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: what even

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: Truly Inspirational

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: brings a tear to my eye

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: vividly flashbacks to the tear gas incident 

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: tear gas incident?

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: so for some reason Zack started collecting tear gas canisters

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: and we were playing hot potato with a grenade and it ended up rolling over to the canisters

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: You don’t know true fear until you stare at 50 canisters of tear gas exploding and it stares back

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: Yea Shadowsan went protective Dad mode when he saw them all crying

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: they always ask “Why are you crying”

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: not “how are you crying”

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: wait

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: no important thing is

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: he took them out for ice cream without m e

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: you are on a p h o n e

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: silence traitor

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: So the lesson of the story is murder your friends before they can go get ice cream without you

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I like this lesson

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I DON’T!

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: did you guys say you were playing hot potato with a g r e n a d e

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: what like its hard?

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸:

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: see we did stupid stuff

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: bUT WE DIDNT PLAY WITH GRENADES JESUS

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: THE WORST WE DID WAS BOMB THE UPPER CLASS MEN’S ROOM WITH EXPANDING PINK FOAM - BELLUM STYLE

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I’m afraid to ask

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: just imagine a room filled to the roof with pink foam and screaming people

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: and then multiply that by 5

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: it was m a g n I f I c e n t

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: What the heckity kind of high school did you even go to?

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: “School of Murder and Pickpocketing and the occasional detention where Graham spent The Whole time saying puns”

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: you know you love my puns

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: no one loves your puns

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Ah well I think his puns are hmm what’s the word..?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Inventive?

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: Jules no-

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: don’t support him

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: if I have to hear another goat pun I’m going to shoot myself

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Jeez you must have Forgoaten how good my goat puns are

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: why is Jean Paul climbing the school building again

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I’m going to jump

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: DO A FLIP

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: 

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: I meme/vine when I shouldn’t it’s a problem

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: it’s all because of my condition

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: ‘He had to do it to em’ syndrome

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: ignoring Player’s heart breaking condition I HAVE THE DEETS

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: say ‘Deets’ again and I’m ripping your nose off

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: Somebody’s feeling testy

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: is it because you got partnered up with that one under classmen who likes making paper airplanes but lines them with poison

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻:

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: yes

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: idk she seems pretty to me

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: sHE KEEPS TRYING TO GIVE ME HEAD PATS

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: are you not a furry

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: are you not the dirt I walk on

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: Yes, step aside filth

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: now I don’t know for sure

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: but I’m 99% sure Zuko said that in Avatar 

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: so

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: dont do it hoe

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: lmao nerd

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻:

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: WHY ARE YOU ON MY WINDOW??

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: HOW DID YOU EVEN GET HERE??

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: WHERE DID YOU COME FROM??

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: AND MOST IMPORTANTLY WHERE THE FUCK DID YOU GO

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: -cotton eyed joe

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: Thank you we all needed that

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: S H E I S I N M Y H O U S E

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: BUT WHERE?

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: well I was planning on murdering you by poisoning your coffee cakes cause I know you’d eat them anyways

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: solid reasoning

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: but is this a p h o t o a l b u m

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Plenty of people have photo albums.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: do they have photo albums of their classmates at V.I.L.E. 

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Touché.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: So Pro - I now know where Tigress is

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Con - She found the class photo book and their is blackmail material in there

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: blackmail on whom?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: if you’re in there there’s blackmail

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ok while I am cackling at some of these pictures. Why does every pic where it’s just Me, Antonio, Jean Paul and Carmen have ‘Furries’ scribbled on it

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: i lEFT THE FURRY LIFE LET ME LIVE IT DOWN

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: no

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: no

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: No

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: my ‘No’ is capitalized because I’m better than you guys

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: his tigress is showing

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: oi

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I’m going to Kermit sewer slide

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: AND MOVING ON TO THE TEA I HAVE

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: so me and Jules were talking with Senior Baguette

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: You know he’s gonna find out about that nickname.

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: and I will laugh when he does

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: Mans said “I bEt YoU kIds CANT sTeAl AnYtHiNg FrOm Me”

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: like how dare?? Anyways he hasn’t realized I stole his wallet and he never will

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I call stealing his car

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Why?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: because when he loses his car it makes me feel unreasonable amounts of joy

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: and he ate one of my coffee cakes

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: can he devinot

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: wait so we are robbing our teachers now?

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: sweeeeeeet I want his couch

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ok but why

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: because

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: it will confuse him

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: “They took my couch? Why?”

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: “How’d they do it?”

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: “nOT MY COUCH WHY?”

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: even better let’s steal all his furniture while he’s still in the house

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: It’s not like it’d be hard.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: He has two braincells. One for screaming the French anthem and one is for yelling LA FEMME ROUGE.

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: wow shots fired

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: She’s growing up so fast

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: 🦗🦟🦗🦟🦗🦟🦗.

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I fucking love you so much I’m

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: YOU’RE A LESBIAN? I THOUGHT YOU WERE BOSTON

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: well I didn’t mean it that way but Jules is adorable 10/10 would date

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: ^

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: ^

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ^

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: ^

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ^

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I’m really gay but I guess I’d give Jules a piggy back ride

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ʕっ• ᴥ • ʔっ

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀:

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Please I can only blush so much.

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: See adorable

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: S t o p.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I am no longer baby I want power.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ew I can hear Fedora the Explora and Female Ginger cooing through there screens

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: if you want power mind helping us steal from Senior Baguette. Just distract him while we rob him of everything including his dignity

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Okay but I want his badge.

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: Lol why

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: All you need to know is that it involves super glue.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: d e a l

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: also high key can I bring my Under class men partner psycho maybe has rabies thingie to the ghost raid

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I want to see the fear in her eyes

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: who hurt you

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: Physically or Mentally or even Spiritually

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: protocol for traumatized friend - movie night

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: noooooo

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: yes give in

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: we can watch those terrible rom coms you like

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: he says terrible but he ends up emotionally attached in each one

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ugh gooooood fine

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I’ll steal Zack’s lucky charms for movie night

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆:

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗻𝗼 𝘀𝗵𝗮𝗺𝗲 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I agree to movie night but I want to meet Tigress’s under class men thingie

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: you really don’t

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I’ve seen her make a sharp katana out of paper and commit arson in the same 5 minutes

𝙃𝙖𝙘𝙠𝙚𝙧 𝙑𝙤𝙞𝙘𝙚 𝗜’𝗺 𝗜𝗻: now I really want to meet her

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: let’s just invite her to the chat

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: y e s who has her number

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: regrettably I do

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: she either sends me pics of cats saying “thinking of you” or spams keyboard smashes

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: years have been taken off my life

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: please tell me she’s shown you knife cat

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻:

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻 𝗮𝗱𝗱𝗲𝗱 𝗣𝗮𝗽𝗲𝗿 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿 𝘁𝗼 ‘𝗪𝗵𝗼 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗳𝘂𝗰𝗸 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗹𝗲 𝗺𝘆 𝗹𝘂𝗰𝗸𝘆 𝗰’ 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱 𝗣𝗮𝗽𝗲𝗿 𝗦𝘁𝗮𝗿’𝘀 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗼 𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇 

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: owo

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: not another damn furry

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: 🤺🤺

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: so anyways I’m still at Graham’s house

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I’ve accepted the fact that she lives in my vents now

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: concerned I always befriend the vent crawlers

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I stole all his photo albums and I now have Baby Graham pics

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: holy shit

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: Tigress you have to send me those

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I’m trying but the wifi is shit

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: now idk

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: bUt MaYbE iTs BeCaUsE yOu’Re In GrAhAm’S vEnTs

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: yEa TiGrEsS

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: ooo wait waity wait so when you crawl in the vents it’s fine but when I do it I’m a ‘domestic terrorist’ that’s unfair don’t ya think 🥺

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ITS BECAUSE YOU THROW RAZOR SHARP PAPER STARS AT ME FROM THE VENTS

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: aww but I’m helping you stay on your toes

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻:

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: thanks Paper Star

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: Ooo I’m being thanked hmhmhm wait why why why

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: pussy cat just screamed in frustration because of ya and now I can drag her out of the vents kicking and screaming

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: That’s Tigress screaming?

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: oh I thought Senior Baguette had seen a centipede again

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: low key I am filling his car with centipedes for stealing my coffee cake

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: JESUS WHATS WITH YOU AND COFFEE CAKES + SPARKY STICKS

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: They please my inner demons

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: My inner demons like bagels

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: hey who wants Senior Baguette’s tranquilizer gun

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: ME! I CALL IT

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: alrighty

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: finally I can sleep gas Shadowsan and tie him to a chair to force him to binge watch movies with me

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: nO

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I don’t usually ask this but

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: aRe YoU oK???

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: no not really it kinda happens when you fall and the last thing you hear before you lose consciousness is a pun

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: that’s rough buddy

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I feel like I should stop you

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: but you seem like you need this so I’m dropping off the tranquilizer gun

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: thankies

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀:

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I’m done with power I’m going back to baby.

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: ISJSKKSISK PLEASE SPALLSL FUCKING ADORBS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -I have successfully ruined my friendships temporarily with Spice Girls
> 
> -It’s all I’ve ever wanted
> 
> -I really need to stop taking every pic of Gray and meming it
> 
> -This is a serious problem guys
> 
> \- Someone told me I won’t write well if I’m tired
> 
> \- I am writing at midnight to s p I t e them
> 
> -Like Graham I run on spite and the occasional cracker
> 
> \- If anyone wants to create photo’s for the photo album I will take them all and make an actual photo album. By creating photos I mean drawing please don’t take that literally.
> 
> -Stan the V.I.L.E. roommates


	7. Part 2 of what chapter am I on again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter consistency? Who’s she? I swiped left 
> 
> Also when I use Carmen like this ‘Carmen’ I mean the opera

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I am giving you guys one more chance.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Don’t do whatever you’re about to do.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ( •̀ᴗ•́ )و ̑̑

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: ME AND GRAY MANAGED TO CONVINCE BELLUM TO GIVE US A FLAME THROWER MUAHAHAHA

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Well it was more of she threw it at us and started staring off into the distance

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I worry for her health

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: she once made me throw her off a roof

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Why the heck did you and Graham think we needed arson on our list of felonies?

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: her and Graham don’t have the ability to think wdym

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺:

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: Ignoring the collective depression Graham and Red are in

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: F I R E

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: A R S O N

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: A R S O N

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: Here’s a helpful tip - Don’t try and commit arson with febreeze it’s not flammable

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: and you know this because??

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: we tried to make a febreeze flamethrower to get out of a pop quiz

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: Didn’t work sadly

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: but my test papers smelled better than Zack ever has

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: @god

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: smite me almighty one

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I don’t want this life anymore

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: what’s with him

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: I’ll smite you!✨✨

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: wait-

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: just kidding! Even I have standards

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: WH- I AM OFFENDED

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: COME ON SMITE ME RIGHT NOW

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: nah but I can poison Kitty’s drink and you can pretend it’s you

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: exCUSE ME 

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I AM RIGHT HERE

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: And? OvO

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: BEGONE THOT

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: so Zack is dying now right?

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: yea lmao he got the flu or smthin

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: pretty sure Shadowsan caused this to get out of movies but I don’t question his ways anymore.

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: and I don’t even have cough drops

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I GAVE YOU A WHOLE BAG WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DONT HAVE COUGH DROPS

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I don’t think a whole bag is a healthy amount-.

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: ok that’s my bad

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻:

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: ok but in my defense you gave him cherry cough drops what did you expect

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: P l a y e r I will h u r t you with a large to medium tree branch

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: @ 𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣 share the cough drops and I’ll keep you away from Scary Ivy

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: deal

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Yea ok ignore me; I see how it is.

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: What is with the cough drops??

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Dude

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: they are t h e shit

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: 

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: look at what you’ve done

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: he’s muttering in French, English, Spanish and I think Russian?

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: yea Russian. Be ashamed

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Yo ghost hunting ghost hunting 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: besides Zack may he rest in piece

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I’M NOT DEAD

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: Sometimes I can still hear his voice

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: so young

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: 

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: actually yea I’m dead and I plan on possessing the school speakers to play spooky spooky skeletons on loop 

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I like dead Zack

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: ^

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: You really just said he’s better dead than alive.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: even I think that’s harsh and I’ve thrown a child off a playground

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: it was funny to watch it happen though

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: this is just sad on the other hand

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: AHAHA FINISHED

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: finished what

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: I’ve been binging Buzzfeed to be prepared for ghost hunting

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: oh yea like that will help

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: fuck you goat man

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Please don’t actually go ghost hunting.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: so you still underestimate our sheer dumbassery?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀:

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: hEY LET’S SPLIT UP WHILE GHOST HUNTING

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀:

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: No.

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: cool I call Antonio

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I’m going with the gays

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: idk Antonio is pretty buff so it’s probably safer going with them,, and I want to see Pussy Cat scream

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: 𝗝𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝗵𝗲’𝘀 𝗺𝘆 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝗯𝘂𝗳𝗳 𝗯𝗼𝘆𝗳𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗱 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: I’d rather have Ivy, Jules and Player honestly

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: explain 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: Your guy’s chaotic energy is to be feared and I don’t wanna die

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: “our chaotic energy”

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: she says like she isn’t the one that tried to tame a parrot and it ended up attacking us

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: shshshsh Rainbow was a good parrot

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: HE TRIED TO RIP MY BLOODY EAR OFF

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: out of affection

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™:

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: all around me are familiar faces

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: wOrN oUt PlAcEs

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: don’t patronize me

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: Oh wowowo Kitty Cat wasn’t kidding about ghost hunting. Kinda dark in here

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: can I watch Kitty Cat get possessed by a cat ghost

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Signs point to no.

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: well that’s boring I was hoping to hear her purr again

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: she did what now

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: ^

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: ^

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: ^

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I NEVER PURRED DAMMIT

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: I recorded it and it’s my ringtone for when you call me

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: SLANDER AND DECEIT 

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Ok but why’d she purr

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: because I’m a joy to be around 

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: no

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: you’re right it’s because I gave her head pats

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: nO IT WAS BECAUSE I WAS COMFORTABLE OK

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: sO YOU DID PURR

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I’m getting Mime Bomb to kill you all

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: oh yea? How

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: was that a god father reference?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: lmao nerd

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻:

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: Tigress we are in a dark scary school you are not allowed to just disappear into the shadows

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: Tigress is2g

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ฅ ̳͒•ˑ̫• ̳͒ฅ /╲/\╭( ͡°͡° ͜ʖ ͡°͡°)╮/\╱\ ( ๑>ᴗ<๑ ) ┬─┬ノ( º _ ºノ)

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: is he alright

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: holy shit his keyboard is just emoticons

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: huh so that’s his version of a keyboard smash

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: What happened?

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: He sent that first text right behind us and seeing a light right behind you in a haunted school is not a pleasant thing

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: so can we really be held responsible for our actions?

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: ?

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: they both punched Mime Bomb in the face while screaming like children

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: officer in my defense I knocked that bitch out on self defense

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I told you I would get Mime Bomb also Antonio why the fuck aren’t you screaming

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: my life is an existential crisis

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: nothing phases me anymore besides thinking about getting suffocated by tar or Dish soap

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: Dish Soap?

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: dish soap?

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Dish soap?

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: don’t

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: remembers it v I v I d l y 

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: fear multiples eXPONENTIALLY 

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: never again 

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: so I called Countess. Cleo and she said you guys each diD A SHOT OF DISH SOAP?? GOOD LORD WHAT IN THE THREE HELLS??

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: That’s all she said?

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: she also asked why I sounded terrible and if I’m taking care of myself

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: Ah

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: and you know that one student that helps her out in class and is pretty much her assistant but no one cares

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: would be hard not to know them after that colorful description

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: yea she sent him over to take care of me cause I’m sick blah blah and help he’s hot

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: while I live for my brother having a gay crisis yOU GUYS DID SHOTS OF DISH SOAP??

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: WHY

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: for science

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: by science you mean Dr. Bellum daring us to

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I mean she is a scientist so s c I e n c y

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: never trust someone that watches cat videos while creating a robot designed to punt children

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: I can still taste it

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: are you guys done ghost hunting cause I need help desperately

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I thought you had that one guy helping you

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: heS THE PROBLEM! HE’S REALLY HOT AND THIS ISN'T GOOD FOR MY MENTAL HEALTH PLEASE

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: eh I think we’re almost done

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: you think?

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: me and Antonio had to carry Mime Bomb out since me Graham broke his nose

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°): ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: seeing a mime aggressively push an emoticon with blood running down his face is forever implanted in my brain

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: also high key we lost Graham and Tigress

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: I’d say RIP but they both had it coming so

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: R e s t I n P I e c e s 

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: ok fuck you

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I found Paper Star locked in a closet

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: That’s so nice of you to help her get out.

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: wh?

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: have you met me??

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I’m the one who barricaded the door

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: Day 1 - I can hear the ghosts surrounding me

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: Day 1 - One of them has a particularly ugly cackle

𝗠𝗲𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲 𝗠𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘇: Day 1 - Nm it’s just Tigress

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: I hate this so much

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: Tigress just stormed out of the building so that’s one less idiot lost

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: will all due respect Jean Paul,, go die

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: Guess who lived bitches

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: dammit

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: dammit

𝗦𝗲𝗲𝗺𝘀 𝗙𝗶𝘀𝗵𝘆: dammit

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: huh I thought you died

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: nah I found Carmen’s group while wandering around

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: more like he was humming ‘Carmen’ and we thought it was some creepy ass ghost coming to drag Carm to hell

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: @𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™ You owe me sushi for that

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: deal also did anyone else know about the basement down here

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: no??

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: oh cause we found one it’s kinda cool

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: AND YOU’RE EXPLORING IT? WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: I think I found a blood stain

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: WE ARE LEAVING RIGHT NOW!

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: ugh fine mom

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: Jules is best mom

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I’m not your mom.

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: yes you are

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: once you enter you can’t leave the mom life

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: oh look the rest of them came out

𝗣𝗼𝗽 𝗢𝗳𝗳 𝗤𝘂𝗲𝗲𝗻: I’m a lesbian

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗖𝗿𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗝𝘂𝗹𝗲𝘀: I’m Omnisexual.

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: I’m bisexual👉👉

𝗟𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝗥𝗲𝗱 𝗥𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗼𝗼𝗱𝗹𝘂𝗺: yo saaaame^

𝗛𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝗩𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲 𝙄’𝙢 𝙄𝙣: I’m aro/ace

𝗧𝗼𝗽 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: not like that you casse-couilles

𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 𝗕𝘂𝗻𝗸: but we still support you

𝗣𝘂𝗿𝗿𝗹𝗼𝗶𝗻: unless you’re Graham then you can perish

𝗚𝗿𝗮𝗵𝗮𝗺 𝗖𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗹𝗲™: why must you hate me so

𝗜𝘁’𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝟰 𝗱𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗹𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝗺𝘂𝗿𝗱𝗲𝗿 

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿: Who told the kids the blown up school was haunted

𝗜 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸 𝗜 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝗮 𝗹𝗔 𝗙𝗘𝗠𝗠𝗘 𝗥𝗢𝗨𝗚𝗘: haha no idea

𝗠𝗮𝗺𝗮 𝗕𝗲𝗮𝗿:

𝗪𝗵𝗼𝗺𝘀𝘁: hopefully they don’t find Roundabout’s blood stain

𝗢𝗵 𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗯𝗹𝗲𝘀: I can’t believe you stabbed me @DadowSan

𝗗𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘄𝗦𝗮𝗻: you had it coming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> -Paper Star forever closeted? Find out next episode!
> 
> -Casse Couille = Ball Buster/Pain in the ass I used the second meaning but take it how you will
> 
> -Ivy and Jean Paul’s friendship is criminal,my underrated and I will carry it by myself if I have to
> 
> -By the wise words of that one guy “Life is soup and I am fork”
> 
> -I’ve been having a crisis about Giraffe vocal cords for at least 3 days so blame there long necks for my absence 
> 
> -Actually don’t slander giraffes I love them very much
> 
> -So I’ve had at least a shot of dish soap if not more and it hasn’t killed me yet
> 
> -Disclaimer: the symptoms on the internet don’t do it justice 
> 
> -My life? Abhorrent
> 
> -Was I the only one that had my school deal cough drops like drugs  
> -I can still taste it
> 
> \- I Stan Tigress and Paper Star’s vibe of ‘I hate you but we both like sharp stuff so let’s just stab something yay solidarity’
> 
> \- You can pretend my sexuality head canons are whatever you want that’s just my opinion


End file.
